From Sick Compassion to Wholeness

There is a level of giving to others, a type of sick compassion, where one person feels a lack within themselves, but because they are patterned as outside-in, are not able to feel it as an internal something that they are lacking. These particular people will find others who have a similar lack and give to them, attempting to fix the external mirror that is trying to show them their own internal emptiness. Understanding the internal lack is the only way to break free from this pattern, but to do this, it is necessary to first look at the external mirror as a reflection of the internal Self, instead of as a broken person that must be fixed.

This lines up with what Jesus taught, “remove the log from your own eye before you attempt to remove the speck from your neighbor’s eye”. In short, a person needs to reflect on and understand their own shortcomings, limiting beliefs, and flawed motivations intimately before they are capable of compassionately giving to another person, otherwise they will add to the problem rather than solve it. Additionally, seeing an external person as flawed is a means of avoiding pain through projecting it onto the so-called victim, it is easier to avoid the painful feelings than own them.

Only an inside-out individual can heal an outside-in world, for as long as people continue to experience the world’s problems as external to their own internal being, they will live in an imperfect world, but when they have taken full responsibility for their own internal life, the external world will reflect their new reality. Relating to the world from a space of wholeness allows you to experience a whole world.

~Nathan Martin & Aline Van Meer

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