There is a deep misconception about the roles of masculine and feminine energy in the world right now, and it has been there for quite a long time. The belief is that masculine energy is a dominant energy, while feminine energy is a submissive energy. This war between the masculine and the feminine has caused many women to forsake their femininity in an attempt at equality, and many men to forsake their masculine energy out of guilt or embarrassment.
There are other ways that our warped perceptions may have caused masculine and feminine imbalances within us as well…for instance, men want women to be “just like them” and “make sense”, which means men are wanting their women to be masculine. And women feel hurt when they are replaceable to their men, because men are purpose driven, while women are relationship driven. If a woman was to get a man who was relationship driven, i.e., feminine, chances are she would feel frustrated with him and not understand why. Women crave men who’s purpose transcends the relationship, and as David Deida would say, “penetrates woman and world with purpose”.
It is also a stereotype that masculine energy shows love by “fixing things”, and so there are all kinds of men who think they are loving their woman by changing their oil or bringing home a paycheck…and a whole lot of women who desperately hope for more but end up making excuses for their men. Some women may also draw on their inner masculine and try to fix their loved ones because that was the example they received from their father.
Men and women also misunderstand the word “surrender” and confuse it with “submissiveness”. Submission is a feeling based in fear, and is the exact opposite feeling of intimacy, which is a feeling based in peace. Intimacy is a pipeline through which love can travel between people, which means when you are acting submissive, love cannot travel between two people! This is contrary to what we you may have been taught by your parents as children, as it was essential to do what your parents told you to receive love, and they would get angry and withhold love when you were not submissive. This is a counterfeit though, as what you were receiving from your parents for submitting to their authority was not love, but fear.
You have been programmed to understand “surrender” as a term to mean that you lost a battle or war, but surrender is actually the capacity to relax into a situation or person without fear, it is a sign of trusting and letting go of perceived control. And yet, you may believe that to let go of your control, you will now be controlled by your man, but to let go of control is to become uncontrollable. Surrender (relaxing) is a very beautiful feminine trait and an extreme turn on to a masculine man, and yet, it is confused with “submissiveness”; where women allow their dignity to be trampled, or seek to draw on their masculine in order to feel powerful and dominant. This blocks intimacy and love, and makes for very unhappy relationships.
Here are a few masculine traits:
- Gentle yet firm
- Doesn’t get defensive
- Primarily seeks freedom
Here are a few feminine traits:
- Challenges the masculine to feel safe and to propel it to greater heights
- Primarily seeks relationship
I highly recommend that you tap along with my four EFT videos below to reprogram your current beliefs about masculine and feminine energy. It is a thirty minute decision that could radically alter how you relate with both men and women with immediate results.
Tap Away Belief that Fixing Things is Love
Reprogram Beliefs about Masculine Energy
Reprogram Beliefs about Feminine Energy
Women Emasculating Men
We’ve come a long way and evolved in our understanding regarding the masculine and feminine, men and women… check out our new two part video series on “Being a Man – Redefining Masculinity” below: